Storytime #7: Update 2 (What I didn’t mention about) - Storytime #Zero(0): This is my recovery story and Storytime #5: My Coming Out Story - Something I hate to admit to most of my family members

Last month, I posted, “Storytime Zero(0), This is my recovery story.” and as well as this year’s post, “Storytime #5: My Coming Out Story - Something I hate to admit to most of my family members.” Well, there is a little more back story that I didn’t mention about. It took a lot of thought and still a little puzzled about my story towards from my past until the part where I went to a Therapist for a couple of weeks towards the end of 2012 - also about few of months or so before that, I was in a world of a mess. - These thoughts took me years to figure out. - But I will try to explain in best of my ability.
Okay, back months before I graduated from high school, when I was 19; for some reason, I went into a depression (due to my mother's verbal abuse on me during my teen years) and tried suicide - with a cough drop / pepper mint candy, twice in two different rooms; (my room and the living room without my parents knowing.)
Then years later, between after I broken off with my second ex and before my car accident (between after Springs and mid-Summer of 2012,) I tried to pray to God, when my parents won’t home with me - to pray the gay away. Then, with my frustrations; I got my car and went to an abandon church for answers; which was not far from where I lived and found nothing there. Next, I went to another church that was known to me (a Catholic Church) while I called my cousin; who was a former spiritual minister for help. When I reached my destination, my cousin and I had a talk about me being queer, and my relationship with my second ex. It was a later in the week in the afternoon when we talked. Then as I was sitting in the car talking to her, a priest passed by in his car, driving into the church, “Maybe that was a sign of hope.” I thought to myself as he did that and said my goodbyes to my cousin, who was still on the phone. I got out of my car and walk up to the church’s doors. I tried to open it, but it was closed for the day. So, as I was marching back to my car with pride and saying, “I can do this! I can change who I am.” However, before I did that process of that, I got an e-mail, a few days later after I got home, from my second ex; who send me a strange message, from using some of my best friend's information into my e-mail. [You know what happened next from "This is my recovery story."]
In the earlier process / stages with my therapist, for a couple of weeks towards the end of 2012. I begin telling her about a little bit of my relationship with my second ex as a mistake with a example of a diagram from the movie, "Why Did I Get Married?" a movie from Tyler Perry. The diagram shows two list - one list as the good qualities between myself and my second ex; and another list as the bad qualities between myself and second ex. Maybe, my therapist slowly decided on conversion therapy on me to not be interested in guys anymore. At first, not to my knowledge; didn't know what was going on with me / didn't mention it to my mother, who brought me to my therapist visits / nor not knew what conversion therapy was at the time. Somehow, after my visits with my therapist, for a couple of weeks towards the end of 2012 followed by being in a group house for almost a year in 2013 and returned home; I returned being interested into guys again, slowly.
(Because I could not stand being a group house with mostly guys with few ladies in the place[s] I was in. At one point, I had to stay with a young couple with a child; in addition, I had a roommate who also had a mental illness; but his was a different from me. And I hated to be around him sometimes. It took almost four or five months before I could move into a group with my own room. I did had one friend, who had a similar mental illness like me; however, I don't reconnect with him anymore. - because of a difference of the lifestyle we have.)
When I did returned home, around October or November of 2013; I wanted to continue in my recovery as I learned about my mental illness and not long afterwards, I returned to college with focus on a new major of study.